Blog entry by James Cook
Over Bandit's with Sam I Am. We review our previous meeting...
Me: "Remember, no touching tonight. I've sat there and watched you do fine up until you started getting grabby."
I then tell him what the girls I was with thought of him...
Me: "They thought you were weird. Like you were trying too hard to be an asshole. They could see it a mile away. That's just not your personality. Try being natural."
He looks kinda down...
Me: "Don't worry. You're doing better than I was when I was where you are. Two years ago, the last date I ever went on, it went horribly. I'll put the story up on my blog about it soon. Keep in mind that for an entire year, I had no one telling me what I was doing right and wrong. God, I got rejected soooooo many times before I even got decent."
He takes off his shirt to iron it...
Me: "Dude, What the fuck!? You're skinny AND you have a gut. That is unattractive as fuck. If you're going to be skinny, then at least add some definition to your body."
We have a lot of work ahead of us.
BoMA. Bandit breaks off to go find his girls, while Sam I Am starts socializing, or tries to. I sit alone in the hallway. Now a lot of you guys are afraid to be by yourself in a bar. Me? I don't give a fuck. I do better when I'm alone. When I'm alone, women aren't afraid to approach me.
I start swirling around my glass of gin & tonic. A few girls look at me. I don't say a word. Tonight is not about me. Sam I am comes and sits next to me. Two girls walk out. They look at me. I look back. They come over and double team me, start grinding on me while I'm sitting there.
I'm sure Sam I Am has read about how women approach me. Now he sees it with his own eyes. I think he's a believer now. Hot women do approach, and you don't have to be a body builder. You just have to look like a sexual guy, and I won't lie, I look fucking good tonight.
Zenfox and Big Misha arrive. Wave me over. Who are these two girls that they're with? No clue...
Zenfox: "Where are your girls?"
I show him the text they sent me...
Doublemint Twins: "Come to McFadden's!"
I'm not going anywhere. They can come to me.
Zenfox and Big Misha point me to the free drinks (all night long, I might add). Gotta love these guys. Pays to know people. Who's Zenfox? A guy that's just as hilarious as I am. he just doesn't write about his adventures.
In one of his recent outings, he had a girl stop what she was doing, she came over, and she got gangbanged right on the spot. He showed me the pics. Fucking hilarious.
Back to tonight. I grab my drink and proceed to walk outside. I see a girl sitting on the couch with her friends. Our eyes lock. She stares at me as I walk by for about five seconds. I then stop to turn around. Still looking at me.
I run into Tes...
Tes: "Do you remember me?"
Tes: "Why'd you catch the bus home? I would have driven you."
I make up some bullshit story. Truth is, I just wanted to leave her house ASAP to avoid the awkward morning after a one night stand...
Tes: "You guys were so loud when you were fucking."
Me: "What're you talking about? We never had sex."
She looks at me...
Tes: "Yes you did!"
I just look at her...
Tes: "How can you say that with a straight face!"
Me: "Speaking of women, who is that girl you were with?"
Tes: "That was her!"
Me: "What's her name?"
Tes: "Oh My God! You are horrible!"
We laugh. Wow. I looked dead at the girl earlier, and didn't even recognize her, let alone remember her name. I'm going to hell. We then make fun of people...
Me: "Look at that girl. I swear, you white girls can't dance for shit."
Tes: "I may be white, but THIS white girl can dance!"
We joke around some more. I notice that she's starting to grab me, getting really close. I know this pattern. This isn't my girl to game. I back off and go outside.
Is she coming on to me? Not necessarily. Remember, I fucked her roommate. However, that doesn't change the fact that I'm starting to make her pussy wet. That isn't a conscious decision. Women talk. She now knows how big my dick is because she made a reference to it earlier. And judging from her reactions(the laughing at every dumb joke, moving in closer to me, touching me, not leaving me) to every word that leaves my mouth, she likes my personality.
Back outside with Sam I Am. He's still touching women. He comes over. I remind him to stop doing that...
Me: "Do you see those girls over there? Try talking to them. No touching, and no assholish lines."
Sam I Am: "Then how do I open them?"
Me: "With anything. Go comment on her shirt or something. Tell her that you like it."
He does it, and he doesn't touch. I then notice something. He was in with this group of girls longer than he usually is. Looks like I made a good call.
Back over with Tes. We're talking. She starts grabbing me again. I look over at an old man. I have no fucking clue why he is here, but yeah, whatever. I lean over to him...
Me: "Dude, she's checking you out."
He goes over and talks to her. I look at her. Huge assholish grin on my face. Comes back over...
Dude: "She wants you, dog. I see the way she looks at you."
Me: "Me? Nah, she doesn't want me."
I start talking to Tes again. The old guy joins us again...
Me: "I'm telling you, she wants you, man."
She looks like she's about to kill me...
Dude: "Don't even play that game with me. I just saw her grabbing all over you. That's your girl."
She really isn't my girl to game. I back off again. Ignore her. She doesn't seem to notice. But then again, it didn't look like Flipper cared about me ignoring her either, and we all know how that turned out.
Time to go. I tell everyone that I'm leaving and not to look for me. I run into Tes. Fun girl. We need to hang out more. I give her my number...
Tes: "Wait, I'm going to call you so you have my number too!"
And so it begins. The calm before the storm.